Traditional Dutch crakers #eatthefuckingcraker

At work this morning a colleague sent an email to everyone in our department that his wife gave birth to a baby boy earlier this week. In Holland we have a tradition that when a baby is born, we eat a type of cracker with either white/blue or white/pink sprinkles to celebrate. So in his email he invited everyone to come and eat these crackers.

After receiving this email, I said to a colleague next to me (who knows my story); “right, I will try and go and eat these crackers then…” ┬áHe said, I will come with you, you got this!

It was fine, I was fine (I walked away when the horror birth story was shared (seriously, why share?!?!?)) and when I got back to my desk, my colleague sat down next to me and shared this poem with me. He said; to me, this poem describes you!

I was speechless, moved to tears and even cried at my desk. Of course everyone thought it was because of the baby news, but it was actually a sentence in the poem that did it. And that is this one: “It matters not how straight the gate”.

To me this stands for my journey as a Gateway Woman, a Childless woman, standing at the gate… Because indeed it doesn’t matter how straight the gate… I will find my way around it.

I did not share this with the rest of the department so I still have people coming up to me to ask me if I am ok as they saw me cry earlier… And just for today, I am going to let them. Hopefully it will make them realise once more just how fucking lucky they are with their offspring and that it’s not a given…

I wanted to share the poem with you all as I think it holds an important message for all of us…

Big hugs, Karin

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